Joyful Living

What is Unschooling? What is Joyful Living?

The unschooling philosophy is that people will learn what they need to learn by living life freely and joyfully in an environment that supports who they are and is rich enough for them to both explore their interests and stumble across new interests.
Extending the philosophy of unschooling into all of life doesn't have a word so I'm calling it Joyful Living. (Among other things like: mindful parenting, peaceful parenting, aware parening, responsive parenting, extending the unschooling philosophy into parenting ... :-)

Are we there yet?

Conventional parenting focuses on the destination. Joyful living focuses on the journey.
Good parents have the goal of being better parents. But how do we know if what we're doing will get us where we want to go?
The problem is that when we focus on the destination, it doesn't help us decide which path to take. Basically it boils down to what sounds sensible and whatever works to get us there.
Conventional parenting, which gets accepted as good parenting, is destination oriented. It's getting kids into college. It's stopping the tantrums. It's making sure kids stay away from drugs. It's about getting kids from point A to point B. It's about molding kids into what we think will help them the most.
If there is one thought that will help you understand unschooling and respectful parenting it is this:

The primary goal is joyful living. All other goals are secondary.

All decent parents, of course, want their children to be happy. But they assume that sometimes happiness needs to be sacrificed to get something better.
But for unschooling, peaceful parents meeting any goal must also meet the goal of living life more joyfully.

If meeting a goal means sacrificing joy, then find a better way to meet the goal.

It's simple to write, but not so simple to put it into practice! Our heads are full of "have tos." We're full of fears of what will happen if we don't do what we "have to." Getting rid of those "have tos" and fears is hard to do!

• The first step is finding something that's better than what you have.
• The second step is wanting to change.
• The third step is figuring out how to change.

So, as you read along, you may wonder why I suggest that parents basically make life more difficult for themselves. The reason is because I believe it leads to a much better place. And that better place is a more joyful life for our children and our families.

Joyce Fetteroll

http://www.joyfullyrejoycing.com/